fandomtownies | Caritas; Wednesday [04/13].

Was it tacky to advertise for your big party on the weekend during your bar shift on Wednesday? Did Summer really care?

Because you could definitely bet Summer was going to try and tell everyone about that party, and, even if she didn't get around to it, she had a few ubiquitous flyers up around the place and smaller little print-outs advertising for the Big Beefcake Birthday Blowout Bash (sorry, Eliot; like a magpie, this one, but she did, clearly, improve on it), juuuust in case anyone missed it.

Look, she had to cover all of her bases. She was pretty sure she might actually die if she threw a party and, like, no one showed up. Forget parasitic brain eaters, evil galactic empires, the breaking of time and space as we know it....a bad party was, like, the most terrifying thing in the entire multiverse.

Wednesday Jello Shot Specials!
~BEEFCAKE BIRTHDAY BASH PREVIEW SPECIAL~

First One Free With a Karaoke Song
Or if it's your BIRTHDAY this week!

Pulsar and Quasar
Star Shine
Rings of Saturn
Green Space Goo

Caritas is open!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

"I... maybe. There was an explosion," Stark said. "And they aren't likely to be happy with me." Or Steve, or Danny, or Travis, or Buck, or Jaye...

"But they like, liked? They like the mask. And the glowing. And wanted to keep me. I didn't want to be kept."

"I mean," said Summer, "I don't think anyone can blame you there. And, like, okay, raccoons, it's called consent, ever heard of it?"

Well, Summer, they were raccoons, so probably no.

"Anyway," she said, "I'm glad you're back. And hopefully they can all just leave you the fuck alone."

Keith the Responsible Business Raccoon understood consent but he was grossly outnumbered.

"I'm glad I'm not there too. And I wouldn't mind being left alone. By raccoons." Being left alone by everyone else might just lead to more wildlife encounters.

"And I," Summer stated, turning around so she could grab a Quasar and lift it in a toast, "can drink to that. That is definitely a mood."

Stark held up his own matching shot and nodded.

"A mood," he echoed, with a tiny smile. "How have you been, while I was locked in a bunker?"

Summer downed the shot and almost wished it was a little stronger, then shrugged.

"Not a whole lot," she admitted. "Mostly party planning, keeping tabs on the store, plotting to foist Issa on Tisarwat now that she's back on Earth, dealing with a Giant Space Baby for fake kids weekend....you know. The usual."

"Giant space baby?" Stark asked, tilting his head. "I missed the children?"

That was absolutely for the best at this point.

"You did," said Summer, with an expression that seemed to cover both bases, whether that was a good thing for Stark of a bad one. "Couple weekends ago? Whenever prom was."

As if he would have known that in Raccoonlandia.

The Underground Free State of Raccoonlandia didn't believe in things like calendars.

"I'm not even sure how long I was down there." Kind of theme for him this year.

"But you had a giant space baby?"

"I did," said Summer. "Or, at least, there's a version of me that had a giant space baby, and he somehow managed to squeeze into a portal and show up here, anyway."

"That's different. Isn't it? I've only ever seen ones that were average-sized."

Blue sometimes, glowy often, but never outsized.

"I mean," Summer said, sighing, shaking her head a little, "it tracks, doesn't it? If anyone's going to be stuck having a rando, giant ass space baby, it would be me. I can't help but wonder if this is all because of that one time I accidentally made myself a giant...like, maybe it messed ip my genes or something."

Not a bad guess, Summer, no, but it was so mucj weirder than that.

"Did your giant baby have another parent?" Maybe that explained it? Maybe that explained too much of it.

"Or maybe it's just one of those things here that has no explanation."

"I mean," said Summer, "there's always an explanation, even if it's just a really dumb one. But I have no idea on the other parent. Barry tried to run a test, but he said it was inconclusive."

It was not, but Barry wasn't going to be the one to drop that bomb on his girlfriend if he could help it."

Barry was a wise man not to share what he knew. Very wise.

"Sometimes knowing the other parent just makes it more confusing." Like last year's child with Liam had been. "More than some of them already are, anyway."

He definitely came by that super-genius title honestly.

"I mean," Summer pointed out, "I really didn't think you could top that year I had a kid with a stuffed cat, but then Naruto showed up, so....

"....I'm kind of worried about next year now," she admitted.

"You had a child with the cat? The one who worked here?"

Stark, your child that consistently appeared had a plant for a mother, don't judge.

"Maybe next year will be less odd?"

Maybe he'd be around next year. Maybe.

"I had a child with the cat," Summer confirmed with a nod. "The one who worked here.

"And last year wasn't weird, like, at all, and neither was the one before the Year of the Cat and Seivarden, not really, so maybe it's an on/off switching sort of thing for me."

"I've only had the three. Not with any cats." Or any other animals. "Liam, last year. Bridge who was at school when I was. And Zhaan. All of them were surprising."

Caritas; Wednesday [04/13].

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