fandomtownies | Entries tagged with kyle katarn

Jaina arrived back in Fandom too late to unpack any of her things, but a little early for work. Figuring it was better to be early, she ditched her stuff in her room and headed into town, opening the door to the bar-

And found Tino once again naked behind the bar. She would never, ever ask what she would have seen if she'd been any earlier.

Two minutes later, he was clothed and sanitizing everything while she kept glowering at him. Too bad she couldn't bleach her brain.

Current Mood: just no

survivesplague.livejournal.com

Kyle walked into the bar and immediately told Tino that he was going to be heading home in a few days and wouldn't be working with him anymore. Tino asked if it was because of the nudity last week. "Yes, it is," Kyle told him. "As a Jedi, I can't work with naked people. Except for maybe Wookiees and Ewoks."

[OOC: Yep, Kyle's leaving shortly. But he's here tonight!]

survivesplague.livejournal.com

When Kyle walked into Caritas tonight, Tino was naked. No pants. No apron. No silly hat. No socks. Buck nekkid.

"It's going to be one of those nights, isn't it?" Kyle asked.

Tino nodded. Vigorously. It wasn't just his head that shook up and down.

"Sith spit," Kyle said, making his way to the lounge.

[OOC: Mod naked Tino at the bar tonight. If you want to talk to Kyle, he's in the lounge.]

survivesplague.livejournal.com

Whenever Kyle went into his desk today, he found an egg. It was strange. He wasn't sure who would put eggs in his desk or why. It just seemed like strange behavior.

No, he didn't know about Easter.

[OOC: No OCD!]

survivesplague.livejournal.com

Kyle was here. So was Tino. Together? THEY SERVED DRINKS.

Well, mostly Tino was having Kyle do it. But still.

[OOC: Sorry for lateness. Loooooong day.]

survivesplague.livejournal.com

Kyle got into work a little late today - he had to deal with a lizard on his way in - but he wasn't going to let the chaos on the beach keep him from being available for people who might need some help.

True. Most of those people were probably on the beach already, but he had faith in them.

[OOC: Kinda late and no OCD because I'm laaaaaaame.]

atreideslioness

Tyler and Ghanima were both there early today, waiting for everyone to arrive.

"Good evening," she started, looking around the space. "Welcome back, and we're back to our randomly assigned pairs."

"Miss Dinah Lance and Miss Claire Bennet. Mr. Jono Starsmore and Miss Lulu. Jedi Tahiri and Miss Fa Mulan. If you do not already know each other, please introduce yourselves. You are partners for your fights this evening."

Tyler just rolled his eyes at Ghani's formality. "Jen, grab Blysse. Katarn and Hathaway, Mayor Summers and Blue Girl. Go to it."

[OCD is up!]

survivesplague.livejournal.com

For the second time since he had worked at the Freelance Police, Kyle actually had a case to work on. A bunch of rats dressed as pirates strolled in - through the front door - while chanting a long series of numbers. They wanted pies. 3.14159 pies.

Kyle went out, bought four pies, and brought them back to the HQ. The pi-rats - who apparently had an extraordinary sense for how big a slice 0.14159 pies was - paid Kyle back for the food and left him 0.85841 pies as a tip. A delicious tip.

[No OCD for Pi Day!]

survivesplague.livejournal.com

When Kyle got to the bar, he found Tino sitting in an office chair, holding a cocktail shaker, and spinning around. "Are you serious?" Kyle asked him, reaching out with the Force to stop him. "You're doing that all wrong. Let me show you."

And that's how Kyle ended up spinning around in a chair.

cataclysmicluck.livejournal.com

Cobra Commander had the giant peach bomb in a warehouse. He also had his broadcasting equipment set up and a teleprompter loaded with his crazed rant about how he had a giant peach bomb that could destroy an American city if he wasn't given control of the country in twelve hours. He was just waiting for the Oscars to start so he could take over that feed for greater effect.

Yes, that meant the Commander was watching Barbara Walters. Shut up. He would totally kill you if you said anything about it.

[OOC: For certain individuals, not all of whom are me.]

survivesplague.livejournal.com

It started with Kyle trying to find somebody to either look after the weird English kid or go look for his giant peach. He figured a detective agency or whatever this place that you paid for policework might be able to do either of those things.

Somehow he ended up sorting paperwork. Or, rather, he created a green energy collator to sort the paperwork while he tried to not be bored.

The Freelance Police were open for business, kind of.

[OOC: I'm heading into the office for a few hours in a little bit, so I'll be AFK until about 6 Eastern or so.]

solo_sword

Jaina was not quite herself today, so she would not be opening up the bar. On Monday she was going to have withdrawals from having gone this long without showing up to work.

Tino, however, was completely himself today, and he was looking oh so pleased about having to be here on a day everyone had gone insane again.

...Maybe he'd get a hookup from someone who didn't know any better. That made him feel better.

[Mod Tino for all your drunken-AU-hookups-that-you'll-regret-on-Monday needs!]

survivesplague.livejournal.com

Kyle put up a sign on the front door saying 'Gone Meditating: Need help? Call Sam & Max or the actual police.'

And then he wandered off to the woods to meditate. Could he have done this during the past week when nobody was around? No, he couldn't. And there were good reasons for it. Just no real reasons worth discussing.

[OOC: The actual reason is that I'll be at a sports bar for most of the day and just woke up when I have to meet people in like an hour. USA! USA! USA!]

guardian-god.livejournal.com

Just two weeks ago, Dimitri had been too busy working around the clock to pause for an hour and enjoy himself with friends when presented with the opportunity.

Now, he was creating the time. Yes, it helped that most of the island was on vacation and Dimitri was spending as little time at the gym as possible after an unfortunate, yet thankfully one-sided, discussion of Real Women with Jessi.

After gathering the American pool equipment on an unoccupied table, he set things up and started taking a few practice shots for the sake of his rusty skills.

After a few minutes of concentrated play, he realized there was hockey showing on the televisions hanging around the establishment, leading to a frowning Dimitri. Canadians.

[Fast Eddie's is open to ALL!]

Current Mood: indescribable

survivesplague.livejournal.com

Anyone visiting the bar today would see something odd: Tino, standing a foot taller than Kyle (due to a step stool), wearing a large platinum medal around his neck. Tino argued it was a medal for being the hottest bartender around.

Kyle just ignored him and did his damn job.

[OOC: I'm around!]

survivesplague.livejournal.com

Kyle walked into the bar and gave Tino a quick nod. "Yep, you're stuck with me tonight," he said. Tino sighed and stopped dancing.

Apparently he had been doing that since yesterday. What could he say? Tino loved to dance.

[OOC: This would have been up earlier but I apparently decided to nap instead. I'm awake now, though!]

survivesplague.livejournal.com

Kyle was watching the Olympics as he sat at his desk. He had to admit, the biathlon seemed like a pretty interesting event. There was just something about skiing somewhere and then shooting targets that felt like it could actually be useful in the real world.

survivesplague.livejournal.com

When Kyle walked into the bar, he was greeted a laughing Tino. When Kyle saw the heart-shaped card, he understood why.

The valentine didn't have writing on it so much as it had random marks and curious stains. When Kyle looked out at the lounge, he saw a zombie woman who would have been smiling in a flirty manner if she still had a bottom lip or right eye. She waved.

Tino laughed some more.

survivesplague.livejournal.com

Kyle had learned the punishment for missing a day of work: The Force found a way to make him host a speed dating event.

Caritas Presents
THREE MINUTE DATES
Hosted by Kyle Katarn
In the time it took you to read this sign, you could have rejected three people.

"Let's get this over with!" Kyle said with sarcastic enthusiasm. "Here's how it's going to work. I'll read two names. You find each other and talk for three minutes. When those three minutes are up, you'll hear this sound...."

From behind Kyle, a loud "CHUNG CHUNG" chimed. The Zombie Bass Player swore it was a "DOINK DOINK," though, so it was open to interpretation.

"Then I'll read off more pairs and we'll keep doing it until we've done it five times. May the Force be with you."

[The Bar Before the Dates | Round 1 | Round 2 | Round 3 | Round 4 | Round 5 | Post-Date Mingling | OOC]

[OOC: Three minutes = ten comments total, five per person. You don't need to do your threads chronologically, but try not to Joss yourself.

Epic OCD is beginning. For the love of god, please wait until I'm done. If I made a blatant mistake, like skipping a character completely for a round or posting a pairing twice, feel free to grab me on AIM and I'll make a quick fix. Possibly after crying. Have at it, daters! Remember, attacks on your dates will get you teleported elsewhere on the island.

Also remember that most playing should happen on Saturday, but if you need to finish a thread or two on Sunday, that's fine.

~~ETA (10AM Central): I'm heading into the office now! If there are any issues with missed pairings or anything, let me know and I'll correct it in a few hours when I'm back at my computer!~~ I'm back!]

survivesplague.livejournal.com

Kyle wasn't really much of a carnival guy, so he went to work today. Not that he expected any clients, unless somebody was abusing the number of allowed pies you could throw at someone or something. Although that would be an interesting case.

[OOC: I'll be afk until early evening. Booo working on the weekend. Booo.]

likethegun

During the night, Fandom had been covered in a blanket of fresh snow that was just thick enough to turn everything crisp and white. With cream-colored decorations and twinkling lights, the Student Council had aimed for a winter wonderland kind of theme, and the snow simply added to the effect. Thankfully, the day was turning out to be warmer, so those who were going to be outside all day wouldn't freeze. Once the finishing touches were done, the carnival was open for business.

[OCD IS UP! Kissing Booths | Dunk Tanks | Pie Tossing | OOC | First Post]

survivesplague.livejournal.com

Kyle walked into Caritas very, very late.

"Sorry. Couldn't find my room key," Kyle told Tino. "Don't ask me why some guy in the back room of J,GoB had it, I still havent figured that out."

[OOC: Yeah, I suck.]

survivesplague.livejournal.com

Kyle was standing outside of the HQ today, surrounded by gremlin limbs and a sign saying "NEED GREMLIN HELP? JUST SCREAM!"

He didn't expect anyone to read, the sign, of course. And he also didn't expect a bunch of gremlins jumping off the roof onto him. Kyle only had a brief moment to react, so he used the Force to increase his speed, pull the gremlins toward him, and then dive backwards. Some of the gremlins hit him hard, making him drop his lightsaber and clinging to him with claws and teeth. Most of them hit the ground with a satisfying splat. It was a mostly successful strategy. A flurry of punches took the hangers-on down before Kyle called his saber to him before checking on the gremlins who survived the splat.

[OOC: OCDless? THIS IS FREELANCE!]

survivesplague.livejournal.com

When Kyle got to the bar, the first thing he saw was Tino wearing a beard. "Is... is that a fake beard?" he asked, leaning in for a closer look.

Tino refused to answer, so Kyle grabbed the beard and pulled it off Tino's face. "Next time, grow a real one."

Tino looked sad.

survivesplague.livejournal.com

"Getting here would have been easier if I had a taun taun," Kyle mused as he walked into the office today. He didn't take his coat off when he got in, though. He knew that he was going to have a case right away. It was The Case of Trying To Shovel the Sidewalk So That People Can Get Inside a Little More Easily If They Are Stranded In The Blizzard and Need To Come Into a Building and Sit By A Fire.

That was not an official case title.

[OOC: OCD is in the snow somewhere.]

survivesplague.livejournal.com

Kyle was up to two weekly jobs in Fandom now. Not only did he have the always exciting life of a mercenary policeman in a town with no need for either mercenaries or policemen to look forward to, but he also had the slightly less exciting life of a teacher who wasn't scheduled to do any teaching for weeks but who did get to sit on a panel.

And that's why tonight, on his first night working at Caritas, Kyle was determined to do some actual work. "You're going to drink this," he told Tino as he put a bottle of beer on the bar.

Tino saw the lightsaber. He knew what that meant for him if he didn't make a good impression now. He'd spent over a year with Jolee, after all.

[OOC: Hey, lookit this. I have a shift at Caritas again.]

survivesplague.livejournal.com

Nothing much was happening at the FPHQ right now, so Kyle was cleaning his Bryar pistol. Don't ask why a gun that used energy clips and shot lasers would really need to be cleaned. It just did. And he was doing that.

[OOC: Yeah, I've got nothing. No OCD!]

survivesplague.livejournal.com

Kyle didn't have the key to his desk drawer on him. He sighed and began the search.

It took him around the block to J,GoB, up to the rooftops to find a key to unlock a padlock that was on a garbage can in the alley. The only thing in the garbage can? The key to his desk drawer.

As Kyle made his way back into the office, he sighed again. "I really need to just get myself a keyring."

[OOC: The OCD is in a hidden compartment three floors up. It is Secret Area 1/3. I choose not to search for it.]

survivesplague.livejournal.com

In order to get a little practice in while waiting for clients, Kyle was making a house of cards on his desk, using the Force to stack the cards.

Honestly, he was cheating there. By the time he got to the third level, the house was about to collapse, but he used the Force to give it some reinforcing.

[OOC: I shun OCD. SHUN IT!]

survivesplague.livejournal.com

Kyle was on a very important case. It was the Case of Trying To Fight Off a Cold. You'd figure his Force powers would help him kick it, but no. The stupid thing kept sticking around and he kept sneezing.

Stupid cold.

[OOC: No OCD.]

survivesplague.livejournal.com

Kyle didn't wear hats and he had no concept of Santa Claus, so this thing on his head perturbed him.

The fact that he couldn't seem to damage it with his lightsaber didn't help with the perturbation.

[OOC: No OCD in honor of the word 'perturbation.']

survivesplague.livejournal.com

If Hank Katarn knew anything about do-gooders, it was that they wouldn't expect somebody in the Freelance Police HQ to be working on a freeze ray powered by a rare diamond that could freeze the world. The very thing was unthinkable! Who would expect psychotic individuals to work here?

Okay, maybe Hank hadn't done his homework. But still! So that's what he was doing this afternoon at work. Building a freeze ray and cackling maniacally when nobody was looking.

[OOC: The OCD has been frozen.]

survivesplague.livejournal.com

Once again, Kyle was working on a very serious case: cleaning up the office a little. As it turned out, he was very good with a dustbuster.

[OOC: What has two thumbs, no OCD, and has FINALLY found the Kyle Katarn action figure? THIS GUY!]

survivesplague.livejournal.com

Kyle was at his desk, doing paperwork as if nothing strange was happening. Little did Kyle know that the fish was staring at him with malice in its eyes.

Granted, a look of malice looked exactly like the look a fish always has. But still. There was unidentifiable evil intent behind that look.

[OOC: No OCD for me!]

atreideslioness

"You're back," Ghanima said. "Fantastic."

"My back is fantastic," Tyler deadpanned. "Thanks for noticing."

"I'll take away your sugar," she threatened. "People are here to hit things, not flatter your ego."

"Never would have known," Tyler grumbled. "All right. Hitting things. Those two, those two, bandage boy and anger management, and ... you pick the last few."

"Professor Sun, if you'll indulge me," Ghanima replied with a nod before rattling off the last few names. "Let's go."

| Arrive & Mingle | Training & Beginners | RNG Fights | Open Sparring | Talk to the Organizers | OOC |

[ocd up!]

survivesplague.livejournal.com

Even though there wasn't usually much to do at the HQ, Kyle was usually able to get some meditation time into his workday.

If anyone walked in and noticed desks, water coolers, or papers levitating, that's just because Kyle was doing a little bit of training.

[OOC: No OCD here either!]

atreideslioness

"It's Fight Club," Tyler said. "You know what that means. You, you, you, you, you two, and, Ghani, finish up."

"You with her, you two, and you with that gentleman over there," she said. "Now fight."

[OOC: We can has no brainz for ze banter. But the OCD is up, so go hit someone.]

Current Mood: blank

survivesplague.livejournal.com

There was a big case today: finding out why the town was flooded with people. Kyle knew it was because it was Homecoming Weekend. Case solved. Time to have some coffee.

The FPHQ was open.

[No OCD here either!]

survivesplague.livejournal.com

Kyle was actually working on a case today. It was the case of who stole his damn sandwich. There wasn't anyone else in the office today but ten minutes after he got in and put his lunch away, it disappeared. This was going to bother him.

[OOC: Again, afk most of the afternoon and no OCD because the sandwich thief stole that too.]

survivesplague.livejournal.com

Another day at the office, another strange load of paperwork to get caught up on. Kyle wasn't exactly sure where all of this paperwork was coming from, but if he ever found out he had half a mind to blow it up. That would show it.

[OOC: OCD-free!]

survivesplague.livejournal.com

While the rest of the island was spending time with their family, Kyle was doing some paperwork at the HQ. It was weird how much paperwork this place managed to produce despite never having any cases...

Anyway, in honor of the weekend, he called Jan on his comm while he was doing the paperwork. He was glad that long distance charges didn't matter here, because this was very long distance.

[OOC: I didn't forget, I've just been spotty! No OCD and I'll be afk until about 9:00 Eastern.]

survivesplague.livejournal.com

Another week, another check to make sure the fish was still alive. Kyle realized that if Sam and Max hadn't managed to kill the fish by now they probably wouldn't find a way to do it. But still. He had to be sure.

The FPHQ was open.

[OOC: I have very little creativity for writing posts today. No OCD for no good reason.]

guardianborn.livejournal.com

Okay, Rose was totally ready for her first day officially working at the gym as opposed to being there half the time training anyway. Totally ready to help with the weights or clean up messes (not gross ones please) or even pretend she was a dork like Dimitri and read one of those westerns he was always reading.

She was not ready for one of the ~~NPC~~ instructors to hand her a CD and point her towards the aerobics room.

"The cardiofunk thing was a joke! I'm not really teaching a class!"

The instructor cared not for Rose's protests. It was her day off, and the class had to be covered.

Muttering darkly, Rose took the CD and skulked off to make crap up about cardiofunk.

survivesplague.livejournal.com

Kyle had some paperwork to shred. He also had a lightsaber to practice with. Combine these needs and you had paper that pretty much just disappeared.

Who needed a paper shredder?

tyler_gone

"People," Tyler said, looking around the gym. A slight sniffle roughened his voice. "Lots of people. You all came back."

"Which is good, since if they didn't come back, we wouldn't have anyone to boss around," Ghanima pointed out. "Or hit."

"You guys can hit," Tyler said wistfully. "I'm pretty sure I'd give my cold to anybody if I did. I'm just observing today, since apparently I'm the kind of" -- holy word you don't want to use in front of students there, Tyler! -- "person who worries about germs now."

"Next thing we know, you'll be telling people to get off your lawn and futzing about the 'good old days,'" Ghani replied dryly. "Okay. You and you. You. With her. Smile, you with the tiger, you're fighting him."

"Tyler?"

"I am not old," he said sulkily, and folded his arms to survey the crowd. "Oh, him and her, her and him, him and him."

"Go to it."

survivesplague.livejournal.com

With his first meeting as a member of Fight Club later, Kyle figured that today would be a good day to inspect his weapons and make sure they were all in good shape. What this basically amounted to was a man with a frankly terrifying amount of explosives, blaster ammo, and only a couple guns on his desk looking at everything and trying to decide how many stormtroopers they could take out if necessary.

The answer was, of course, "a lot, especially if the mines were placed properly."

Truly, this was the kind of guy you wanted solving any cases you might have involving giant balls of twine.

[OOC: No OCD here, either. There's football on and I'm too distracted watching my two fantasy leagues.]

atreideslioness

"Welcome back," Ghanima began, looking over the assorted company. "I'm pleased to see we didn't scare too many of you off by forcing introductions."

"Luckily for you, there aren't any enforced group bonding activities today. Only sparring."

"Sparring," Tyler concurred. "No talking. And, since we're huge now, more matches. You and you, you and you, you in the back and you trying to look too cool for this. Ghanima, pick the last six."

"You can talk to other people, of course, but only if you want to. And you should introduce yourself to your partner," she commented dryly. "Let's see. You, sir, with her. And you and you. Leto, with her."

"Everyone else, grab someone, grab some mat, and start punching."

"We're here if you need us," Tyler added, retreating back to observe.

Arrive & Mingle / Beginner & Training Area / RNG Matches / Open Sparring / Talk to the Organizers / OOC

[~~Wait for the OCD if you please~~. No more waiting! Go ahead and start hitting!]

Current Mood: accomplished

survivesplague.livejournal.com

Kyle had lost his key to the FPHQ. In order to find it, he needed to search three levels of the hotel, eventually find it on the roof, use the Force to convince a pigeon to retrieve it from its hiding place, and then race to the HQ before time ran out and he was late to his shift.

He made it, but it was close.

[OOC: Why, yes, it's a cheap joke about how illogically placed keys are in Kyle's video games. And I do, in fact, still think I'm funny.

I'll be spotty until around 3:30 eastern, and then I'll be just plain afk until much later this evening.]

tyler_gone

"Ladies! Gentlemen. Boys. Girls. Other sentient life forms." Someone had given Tyler sugar. "Welcome to Fight Club. I'm Tyler Durden, this is Ghanima Atreides. We're in charge."

"Which is the nice way of saying 'welcome to Fandom,'" Ghanima injected dryly. "You're here because you saw a poster, or heard through a friend, and you want to hit things. We support violence therapy."

"Most weeks," Tyler said, "we do assigned matches. This week is different. This week is introductions -- because you haven't said your names enough yet this week -- and some level testing. Introductions don't have to be fancy. Fight Club is not about your life story. Tell us what you like to be called and how long you've been at this and we'll call it good."

"After which, those of you that are new or trying to move from beginner to advanced can show us your moves, while the rest of you grab a friend to beat up," Ghanima continued cheerfully. "Once we've seen you in action, then our new friends can also hit the mats, and proceed to learn how we make friends and influence people here at Fight Club. I'll give you a hint; it usually involves bruises."

"But first, you all have to listen to the rules."

Tyler pulled out a sheet of paper and read them off. "Hopefully those are all clear, if you do not understand ask somebody. If you still do not understand, consider the possible tragedy of head damage and don't fight."

He glanced to Ghanima. "Anything else?"

"These rules are posted on the door for every Fight Club meeting," she said pleasantly. "Anyone who willfully ignores these rules gets bounced out that door. We are here to fight, not babysit you."

"Now, smile, and introduce yourselves, and let's see what you can do."

[OOC: Introductions are for everyone, please. Current classifications are here.]

survivesplague.livejournal.com

One of Kyle's duties at the FPHQ, as far as he was concerned, was feeding the goldfish. It wasn't that he didn't trust Sam and Max to be able to care for a living creature, but... Actually, no, that was pretty much exactly it. As he sprinkled the fish food into the bowl, though, he couldn't help but feel that it was glaring somewhat ominously. But then Kyle pushed those thoughts away because, really, it was a kriffing goldfish.

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